Captain Yesterday Returns
by RatPack2002
Summary: Professor Farnsworth newest invention grants Fry Superman like powers. Please,please review. Complete!
1. Chapter 1

Captain Yesterday Returns

Phillip J. Fry sat lazily as always on his recycled couch chugging away on a can of Slurm. Along with him as always, was his robotic companion and best friend, Bender.

"So let me get this straight. Calculon was in a coma and the whole thing was a dream? Or was he just asleep and the whole thing was a dream? Or was he simply sitting at the kitchen table dreaming?" Fry asked Bender.

"Humans….god. No you idiot, he was bored at his niece's school play, so he made up his own play in his mind. He made up a play about a guy that day dreamed about day dreaming. Brilliant, I tell ya." Bender said, lightly slapping his buddy in the back of the head.

A good two minutes later had passed when Fry finally felt it.

"Oww!" Fry yelled, punching Bender in his metallic head. "Owww!" He yelled again.

Meanwhile, unbeknownst to New New York, the ZooKeeper was below the city scheming for his next great crime. In the center of his lair he had a scale model of New New York which he towered over like a titan among dwarves.

"HA HA HA. I, ZooKeeper, the greatest criminal mind in all the universe have done it again. My plan is sooooo brilliant. By adding to it's brilliance I of course, by super villain rules, must go over it alone for no apparent reason. Bwa ha ha ha!" He bellowed.

"New New York City Zoo has just brought in the most rarest animal in the galaxy, the very last Golden Retriever made of solid gold. Tomorrow night at midnight, making it the day after tomorrow, I shall use my various animal thugs to break in and steal that animal, and hold it ransom for all of the money in New New York. Bwa ha ha ha! The Zookeeper laughed frantically somewhat like the Joker from Batman.

The next morning everyone was sitting around the conference table and Professor Farnsworth was showing off his newest invention.

"Ha ha, the academy called me a fool, but I have done it. I have created a deodorant so potent, that it has the ability to work for one entire week even with excessive showering and sweating." Professor Farnsworth bragged holding up a stick of deodorant.

"Wow, what will you call it?" Leela asked politely.

"Duh, wha? Oh yes, I shall call it Old Right Spicy Guard. Its strong enough for an Atomic woman but meant for a man!" The Professor lectured on.

"Hermes would you like to test it?" He begged his bueracrat.

"Professor you let me test that anthrax mouth wash. You know how that turned out, I was in the hospital for 9 years!" Hermes said, putting his hands up in rejection.

"How about you Dr. Zoidberg?" The Professor asked.

"Professor, that deodorant would block out my cologne, and we all know how everyone loves my musk." Zoidberg said, the whole group looked at him in disbelief.

"Yeah, stench of rotten toe nail fungus." Amy whispered to Leela, and the two began to crack up.

"Fry? I don't suppose you would help me." Professor Farnsworth begged.

"Ok, let me see that." Fry said, taking the deodorant.

He took off his shirt and jacket right at the conference table, with no sense of mannerism whatsoever and applied the deodorant. Within a matter of minutes Amy and Leela began to perk up and become somewhat attracted to Fry.

"I don't know why, but I suddenly want to rip Fry's clothes off and just make out with him. More than usual, is it the deodorant Professor?" Amy said, playing with the zipper on her sweat suit, not taking her eyes off Fry.

"Yes, I put special chemicals in it that made woman appeal to even the least intelligent or attractive men." The Professor said

Leela jumped out of her seat and speared Fry like an NFL linebacker recording a sack. Fry slammed into the ground with a crack in his back.

"Professor, I can't control myself." Leela cried out.

"Jeez Leela, I didn't know you where so lonely, gluh that's right you're a hideous one eyed mutant. Opps did I just say that out loud?" The young Asian girl giggled.

"Here, Leela, this will help, I call it Rejection by Calvin Sky-Line." The Professor said taking a needle out of his lab coat and injecting Leela with it.

Leela began to sniff the air the scent was now repulsive and smelled almost as bad as Dr. Zoidberg on a hot humid day. She looked down and Fry and slammed his head into the floor. Fry's apparently happy expression turned into a sad frown.

"Ok, everyone, I also want to show you my new and improved smell-noculers the portable version of my award winning smelloscope." The old Professor called out.

Everyone got up and followed the Professor upstairs to his lab. Fry still laid on the floor, Leela hit him pretty hard. Suddenly his skin began to crawl and his eyes began to burn.

"Ugh, I feel funny!" Fry said with a grimace.

He crawled to the table and with a lot of effort pulled himself off of the ground and on to his feet. His stomach began to feel swollen and his head lighter and lighter with each break. Thinking he was going to vomit he stumbled into a near by bathroom, locking the door behind him.

"Ugh, I feel like I ate at Arby's twice in a row." He cried to himself.

He looked into the mirror. His skin was deathly pale, even his hair seemed to be getting lighter in shade. Than he blacked out. When he came to he had no idea how much time had passed but he felt a lot better, better than he had ever felt in his life before. He walked to the door but it wouldn't open. Since all doors were automatic he would have to really hit it hard for it to fall down. Hopelessly he punched the door, but to his astonishment it went flying across the room and into the brick wall across the room.

"What the!" He said looking at his fist.

Everyone was still upstairs looking at useless inventions. Nobody had seen what Fry had just done. He had knocked a 1 ton door off of its hinges and clean across the large conference room, with barely a flinch!

"Wooohooo!" Fry yelled.

He ran to the conference table and picked it up with one hand, and began to spin it on his finger like a basketball! He put it back down on the ground lightly as if it where made of paper. Incredible! He jumped towards the Planet Express Ship which was 20 yards away, he felt something he had felt before in outer space when the ships gravitation generator had went down once, complete and total weightlessness.

"No way.. than I must be able to.." Fry couldn't even finish his sentence.

He could indeed fly, he floated around the room and looked at the skylight that was above him. Shooting head first through it, the glass shattered into thousands of tiny jagged pieces as he shot high above the city.

"It looks so tiny and insignificant up here, I've gotten a gift, and I must use it to help mankind." Fry said looking down upon the city.

He spat and watched the glob of mucus fall down to the earth, and slam into a building, knocking it in half, all the people in it began to yell and scream as they started to plummet to their doom.

"Whoops. Sorry, my mistake!" Fry yelled as he watched the people began to fall.

In an instant he shot down toward them and at the speed of light collected all of the falling people and safely placed them on the ground.

"Thanks, but the that huge chunk of building is falling too!" A woman screamed, not knowing that Fry had indeed caused this.

He threw his hands up as if to block the huge structure, in an instinct. His brain new he would be squashed like an ant. To his surprise, the huge building felt no heavier than the desk he had picked up. He flew it back to where it had been attached before and placed it back like a puzzle peace.

"I'd better tell this to the Professor!" Fry said to himself, flying back towards the Planet Express Building across town.


	2. Chapter 2

Within the blink of an eye he was back in the Planet Express conference room. He walked up the lab where the rest of his co workers were.

"Professor, this deodorant, its amazing. It grants men things the only dream of!" Fry yelled.

"Yes, yes. I know, I made it remember." The Professor said. "Now stop interrupting me you moron. I was just showing everyone my collection of molds, spores and funguses!"

"Do you mind if I take the rest of the day off, I uhh, don't feel so well." Fry asked.

"Sure mon, without pay of course, see ya tomorrow, unless we find a replacement for ya!" Hermes waved at fry barely looking.

Fry wanted to rip Hermes in half, no pay? He got angry but thought to himself.

"_I vowed to use this gift for good, not personal gain"_

He stormed out of the building, his heavy footsteps causing the entire building to shake, windows began to break and shatter.

"Oh dear, an earth quake!" The Professor misdiagnosed the situation.

"Your payin for that Zoidberg." Hermes said.

"Awwwwwwwww." Zoidberg moaned.

Fry walked out of the building looking for something else his powers allowed him to do.

"This is like when I hit puberty!" Fry said running down the street in a literal blur.

He found himself at his apartment in an instant. He walked into the doorway and stood in it, the automatic door slid down and crashed into his head damaging the system.

"Didn't feel a thing. Wow I must be invulnerable too!" He walked through the cluttered apartment.

"I wonder where I left that superhero costume. I know I could use my super speed to clean this entire room up, now that I'm so fast I wont have to be a lazy slob anymore." He said to himself.

Just then he had another idea, maybe he had super vision too! He looked around very hard and sure enough, he could see through all the layers of trash and clothes that had engulfed the floor.

"Ahh here it is." He said.

"To think I was going to spend a fraction of a second cleaning. Pfft."

He suddenly sneezed and the garbage and dirty laundry not to mention his wall shot out into the street below him.

"Man that took awhile." He admired his now clean, and 3 walled apartment with an excellent view of New New York.

He slipped into his old costume, the familiar threads of Captain Yesterday.

"Look out, criminals of New New York, Captain yesterday has returned." Fry said looking across the city.

To be continued…


	3. Chapter 3

He soon found himself flying above New New York again, looking for something or somebody that needed help.

"Oh no, my baby somebody help!!"

"Ehh. Not really superheroish enough." He muttered to himself, ignoring the plea for help.

"Damn it. This Slurm machine ate my change!" He heard somebody scream in anger.

He glided down to the man who lost his change. The man gave him he somewhat nervous look.

"Umm your not some kinda transvestite hooker or something, are ya?" The Man ask.

"No, I'm Captain Yesterday, the man from the past!!" Fry said as suavely he could.

He punched the machine which broke open dumping out all the change and Slurm it was holding.

"Can you identify your change, sir?" Fry asked.

"Yeah….heh heh. All of it is mine." The stranger replied.

"Glad to be of assistance, fair citizen, remember, be cool don't do drugs in school!" Fry exclaimed as he took off once again.

"Idiot." The guy muttered to himself stuffing his pockets fool of change, while a police officer stood there about to arrest him.

"Wow. I'm really a superhero! Like Batman, Superman and Captain Kirk!" Fry marveled to himself.

"Captain Kirk was a jack ass! Picard was the better captain!" A nerdy voice yelled from the streets below.

Fry's pupils turned red as red laser beams emitted from his eyes and vaporized his sworn enemy, a new trekkie.

Meanwhile back at the Planet Express building, everyone was sitting around waiting for closing time, there was no deliveries and business was slow.

"Good news everyone, we finally got a delivery today. Since Fry took the rest of the day off, you will fill in for him Amy!" The Professor beamed.

"Finally! Where is the delivery to, Professor!" She asked, excitedly.

"Da wha…….oh yes. Dog Do 6, the dog do planet. You might want to wear some over boots as the surface is a bit warm and gooey." The professor said, clasping his boney hands together and twiddling his thumbs.

"Awwwww." She pouted.

Leela silently loved the fact that the spoiled Martian girl would have to actually get herself dirty for a change. A faint smile crossed her face.

Leela, Bender and Amy boarded the ship, Professor Farnsworth hobbled into the docking bay.

"Leela I forgot to mention, the ship's diagnostic test this morning warned of severe engine core over heating. I ordered a new fusion thing a ma jig on eBay. It wont be here for 3-4 weeks, so don't stress the engine whatsoever. Keep the speed around 1 to 3 lightyears. Now bye bye!" The senile Professor waved.

Leela nervously gave the professor a thumbs up as she walked up the ramp onto the ticking time bomb that was the PE ship.

"Possibly bye bye forever. Those poor fools." The Professor said nudging Dr. Zoidberg.

The Professor and Dr. Zoidberg began to wave as the ship slowly hovered out of the docking bay and soon thundered off into space far above. Perhaps on its final mission. The Professor already had taken some ad space out in the New New York Times.

" _Wow, all this crime fighting sure works up an appetite!"_ Captain Yesterday thought to himself. He spotted a 7 to the 11th power below and swooped down. Unbeknownst to him, it was being robbed.

"Just put all the money in the bag! Nobody wants to get stabbed do they?" A familiar Robot named Roberto threatened.

Captain Yesterday paid no attention to what was going on as he went threw the candy aisle looking at such sweets as Spider Yum, HumanFingers, Three Martians, Baby Ruth's Great Grand Daughter, and Atomic Space Men Balls.

"Gees, I wishes that a superheroes was in the stores." The grimey red baseball cap wearing clerk wondered out allowed.

"Hey I'm a superhero!" Captain Yesterday said poking his head up over the candy aisle.

"We's being robbed ya freakin morons!" Sal, the clerk yelled.

Time seem to go in slow motion as Roberto the psychotic robot began to thrust his knife into Sal's abdomen. Fry didn't even realize he was moving at almost the speed of light towards the violent robot, when he finally realized the robot was laying on the ground dented and ripped apart.

"Thanks, I thoughts I was a goners." Sal said, wiping his brow.

Captain Yesterday was soon flying over the city as laser blast began to fly through a dangerous looking neighborhood.

"Put those weapons down, baby." Url, the policebot coolly ordered the lowlifes.

Obviously the criminals didn't follow the order and began blasting at Url, his partner Smitty watched in horror as he was hit dozens of times falling into the littered street, oil poured out of his frame.

"Noooooooooooooooooooooo!" Smitty yelled, firing his laser blaster frantically.

"Avenge me, Smitty, Oh baby, I think I see Robot-Jesus……." Url sputtered out, the power of machinery being shut down emitted from him.

Captain Yesterday landed behind Smitty. "What seems to be the problem!" He yelled over the sound of laser fire and explosions.

"Me and my partna, were on a drug bust, somebody must have tipped them off! That's the second robot partner I saw K.I.A. my last one, Murphy from Detroit died on my second day…….I think I better quit the force, this city is going to hell in a handbasket!" Smitty said, looking at his laser gun to charge up again.

"Don't worry, I will handle this." Captain Yesterday proclaimed.

"You idiot, they just took out URL the forces robo-cop! Those blasters will….." Smitty couldn't even finish his sentence.

In the middle of the street Captain Yesterday tossed the last gunman on a pile of all the men who had opened fire. The criminal landed with a meaty thud, and Captain Yesterday began to dust off his hands.

"Thank you, what's your name?" Smitty said, holstering his weapon.

"I'm Batman. I mean, Captain Yesterday." He said, taking off.

Out in the darkness in space, The PE ship was steadily on course, Leela was at the helm keeping her eye on the indicators, so far everything was operating normally.

"Bender, could you take the helm? Nature calls." Leela asked Bender.

"Awww. Why can't Amy do it! I do everything!" Bender yelled, not taking his eyes of his dirty circuit magazine.

Leela glared, and made sure the clumsy martian intern wasn't on the bridge. She wasn't, Leela didn't want to hurt her feelings.

"The Professor told me this ship isn't exactly fit to fly, I'm sure Hermes cut some corners just to keep Planet Express in business for another week, Bender just keep track of the indicators, the autopilot is actually sober so its not that hard!" Leela got a little more irate with her Robot crewmember.

"Fine, but you owe me!" Bender said writing something on a notepad and tossing it into himself.

Bender took over the helm and Leela went to the ships head to well, you get the point.

Bender's emotionless gaze scanned over the control panel. Speed 1lightyear, core tempeture nominal. Life support operational. Everything seemed to be in order, although the speed was a little to slow for Bender's taste. His robotic 3 fingered hand pushed the throttle and the speed began to accelerate.

"Lets see what this puppy can really do." Bender said, always wanting to push the ship to its limits, the reason Leela never let him even gaze at the controls for an extended period of time.

The ship began to go into hyperspace, and the stars turned into nothing than long streaks. Bender kept his eyes on the accelerator watching it pick up speed they were now at 4 light years. He didn't notice the heat was also rising at an alarming rate. A claxon began to alarm.

"Bender what the hell are you doing! I told you to just monitor the gauges. What did you do?" Leela panicked.

"Relax, just giving it some gas. You drive like an old female human!" Bender said.

Leela shoved Bender out of the captain's chair and lowered the speed before the ship became a firey collection of debris floating in space.

"What, I was only trying to help! I calculated that we would have arrived 20 minutes earlier!" Bender argued.

"Bender, your calculations are awful. What is 10x10?"

"Aww bite my shiny metal ass. I don't have time for you humans and your inferior brains. Besides, even a human child knows the answer is 20!" The bending bot yelled stomping out of the cockpit to his quarters.

The vidphone began to ring. Leela hoped it wasn't Professor Farnsworth tracking the ship, she doubted it though. She pushed the button, and Amy appeared on the screen.

"Leela, I was doing some diagnostics and, the core reactor is a little bit stressed so keep it at a low speed, I personally don't want to have all of the atoms in my body expand and causing me to explode. Not everyone is as lonely as you, ya know." The snoby intern said, disappearing.

The day was coming to an end and Fry was now back in his apartment, he had finished putting his wall back in place and wasn't in the mood to shoo away all of the owls that had made it a resting ground. He turned on the TV maybe All my Circuits was on.

"In other news, New New York has reported sightings of a mysterious humanoid that seems to either be a savior or a destructor. Morbo finds this man a weakling, and that his superior race will crush him in combat."

There was footage from the convenience store he had stopped Roberto from murdering yet another innocent life. Captain Hero was standing in an aisle looking at all of the candies and scratching himself when suddenly the events began to unfold.

"The masked, disco suit wearing man also was seen at a shoot out assisting law enforcement officers, were he stated that he was Batman and flew off." Morbo read on.

"Batman, a fairy tale hero from the 20th century creator, Bob Kane's head is calling for a lawsuit." Morbo went on.

Fry turned off the TV. Well so far so good, a hero shrouded in mystery an urban legend like appearance. It was almost an error in continuality that the New Justice Squad had already been forgotten, but that's another story.

"It's Captain Yesterday!" Fry screamed at the TV.


	4. Chapter 4

Fry's alarm went off, and his now mighty fist crushed the clock and the nightstand, an explosion of plastic and wooden splinters flew about his messy, and rather smelly bedroom.

"Whoops. That's right, super strength. Something anyone could forget." He said looking at the smashed piece of furniture's remains.

After a quick shower and scarfing down a week old piece of pizza, this one had the least amount of maggots, he checked, Fry was on his way to work. He passed a few newspaper stands on the way, with Captain Yesterday on the front page.

"_If I was capable of reading big people words, I would so buy one!"_ He thought to himself, admiring the photograph of himself on the paper.

Tinny Tim, the orphan-bot was calling out the headlines of Captain Yesterday he gave Fry a look as if he remembered him from somewhere. _"Oh no. He must be able to see through my disguise, he is a robot!"_

Tinny Tim stopped pitching his sale for a moment and hobbled over to Fry, his robotic eyes somehow appeared like an innocent young child, that was desperately in need of some alcoholic beverages . _"Damn it, here he comes. What do I do?"_

"Top of the morning to ya govnah. Pardon me for askin, but are you friends with Bender? The small robot asked in a thick English accent, the type that was complimentary in Charles Dickens's life.

"Uhhh. Yep that's me. Just another slob. Not a superhero. Heh heh." Fry sputtered out nervously.

He grimaced at his own stupidity. If he was going to live a double identity he had to be able to conceal the dual life on each side._ "Maybe I should just use my heat vision and melt him, or throw him into the sun….. look at him though he's so tiny and ill alcoholed. I couldn't live with myself."_

"May I interest you in a newspaper, please, nobody ever buys them anymore. My dad was laid off at the car plant and my mum has a bad computer virus, tis the only way I can help my family, dear suh." The pathetic looking robot begged.

"Reading hurts my brain. Here take this, it's all I have." Fry said handing him some pocket change that was still in his jacket.

The tiny robot put the coins underneath his hat and gave a smile, the best smile a severely damaged robot could give, but none the less, a smile. Fry continued his walk to work, wishing something bad would happen so he could do more good, this whole being nice thing was really working out rather nicely he thought.

He finally arrived to work. Since the rest of the crew was still somewhere in space, Fry pretty much sat around all day, like any other day at Planet Express. He watched such intelligent TV shows such as, The Worlds Messiest Rooms, The Worlds Stupidest Animals, which had an hour long segment about Fry, and The Worlds Laziest Delivery boys, also with a feature of Fry.

"Man I am stupid and lazy! I was wondering when they would honor it!" Fry cheered to himself.

Leela thanked zombie Jesus when Earth came into view. The mission to the dog doo planet was a success, and Amy had to take 4 showers on the flight home. Leela giggled at that thought, that rich girl finally had to do a real job for a change, other than being on the payroll to supply the Professor with any spare organs, if need be.

Everything was functioning steadily, and once the ship was back in the docking bay everything would be fine, this had been one of her more stressful missions, even with Fry's absence. No heads stuck in craters, no loss of body parts, no asinine tours of the moons dark side, no problems what so ever.

"This mission was perfect, this must be the first one ever!" Leela commented.

Suddenly the PE ship began to break into Earth's atmosphere, and just as sudden began to shudder violently. The claxon once again sounded back on day 1 of the mission. Leela quickly activated the vidphone.

"Amy, what the hell is going on. We are out of control!" Leela paniced.

"I don't know Leela…. Everything is shorting out!" Amy cried.

"Do something!" Leela commanded, trying to keep the ship steady fighting the wheel.

"I don't have the power, Leela, I'm an intern not a machine!" Amy cried back, her face visible in a sea of red sirens going off.

"I wish we had a machine that was capable of doing something!" Leela yelled.

Bender had fallen asleep at his navigation system, unaware of what was happening. He was obviously not going to be that machine capable of doing anything to help, that was for sure. She dialed Hermes at the Planet Express office to let him know that the ship was out of control.

Within seconds Hermes ran into the room Fry was lounging on his ass in.

"Whats wrong Hermes!" Fry asked, working on his 50th can of slurm this hour.

"Sweet thrilla in Manila! The Planet Express ship is on a collision course with the city. We could get sued for dat mon!" Hermes panicked.

Hermes continued running around aimlessly look someone panicking in a comic book, or super hero movie. Fry continued to sit there and blankly watch TV.

"It would take a superhero to stop the ship from crashing! A superhero!" Hermes screamed in fear.

Fry scratched himself in the crotch region, and took a sip of his Slurm, Hermes words echoing in his mind. "It would take a superhero, It would take a superhero, It would take a superhero…" Seemed to flood his mind like an ocean.

_What does this mean! My brain feels hurty!_ Fry thought to himself. _Man, I can fly, burn people with my eyes like ants under a magnifying glass, ha ha ha, sit on my ass for god like hours on end, yet I don't know what this Superhero talk means. I wonder if All my Circuits is on TV!_

The TV show Fry was watching had just ended, now the News at Noon was coming on.

"Good afternoon, New New York. I'm Morbo, soon to be your tyrannical ruler" The green alien with the pulsating brain said.

"And I'm Linda. Today's top stories, New New York is about to be obliterated as a dark matter space vessel has apparently lost control, and is about to slam into the city, destroying it."

"Morbo loves obliterated city, the sounds of screaming humans and the stench of their burnt flesh is most pleasant." Morbo said, following with a sinister laugh.

Linda giggled at her co anchor's "joke".

"We now go to Asian reporter, Trisha Takanawa's head in Manhattan who is on the scene live." Morbo grumbled.

"Good afternoon, Morbo and Linda. How are the kids Morbo?" The talking head asked.

"Balgerant and numberous!" Morbo growled.

"That's good news. Unfortunately that's not the news here in Manhattan today. An out of control space vessel is plummeting to earth, and due to a loop hole in DOOP policy, no weapons are to be used to damage an out of control object falling toward a planet, according to the Armageddon Charter, section 4 paragraph 666 which was created by a panel led by Zap Brannigan. I have here little Sally from the Cookeville Orphanarium who has a special message for a certain someone"

"Aww how cute, Morbo. Doesn't she look adorable?" Linda giggled.

"Not as cute as she will as a puddle of plasma!" Morbo grumbled, Linda following always with her signature giggle.

The camera panned in on little Sally, who wore tattered clothes and her eyes held an infinite sadness. It was a shame such a harmless child had to be erased from existence in a cruel, harsh reality. She took the microphone in her small, doll like hands and began to speak.

"I know it looks like it's the end, but maybe a miracle will come and save us and the poor people on the ship. New New York has been through a lot through the years and we always came through, maybe somebody can help. Maybe it could be Zapp Branigan or Calculon himself. But I know somebody that sure could, Captain Yesterday!" Little Sally went on, almost all of Earths viewers in tears due to her sweetness and child like naiveness.

"Yeah, that's right! Captain Yesterday will save us!" Fry exclaimed. "Oh yeah, thats me!"

In a matter of seconds he was in his familiar disco-era costume, hurtling toward the stratosphere to the damaged Planet Express ship. It was falling fast, almost at the speed of sound without the engines running, just Earth's gravitational pull drawing it in.

Leela sat at the helm, tears coming out of her single eye. She had failed her mission and her crew. She was buckled into the seat awaiting impact. She had just given the brace for impact order.

"Leela, if it means anything, here! I stole this from you 2 weeks ago." Bender said handing Leela a small white cardboard box.

"Hey those are my birth control pills!" Leela yelled to him.

Bender had engaged his magnetic feet so he could still walk around in a 0 gravity environment while plummeting miles to his doom.

"Woooooo, Leela. Getting it on, huh? Who's the lucky guy!" Bender exclaimed.

"That's none of your damn business, now brace yourself, impact in 30 seconds!" Leela ordered.

Captain Yesterday squinted still seeing the PE ship in the distance, he would need to build up a lot of momentum to resist the ships speed and slow it down. He began to accelerate and an Owl crashed into his face.

"Stupid Owls. This city really needs an exterminator!"

To be continued…….

_Well Captain Hero be able to stop the Planet Express Ship? Or will he fail miserably due to the fact he is a complete and utter idiot? Tune in next time, on the same Yesterday Channel and the same Yesterday time!_


	5. Chapter 5

Hermes had finally found Professor Farnsworth, who had fallen asleep in the bathroom looking at Ultra-Porn. This image was something that would haunt Hermes for the rest of his life. The two where watching the ships re-entry on a radar screen located in the buildings fallout shelter.

"I never knew we had a bomb shelter, Professor. I could have written it off for tax purposes." The greedy bureaucrat said.

"Yes, yes. All modern day mad scientists have one, it's all the rage like Myspace ." The Professor said.

"You have a Myspace! Wow everyone is on that. I even added the Oriole Bird, the mascot for the Baltimore Orioles at lunch!" Hermes said, with excitement.

"Yes, he is on my top 1 trillion!" The Professor carried on the conversation.

Hermes noticed a blip on the screen moving at a break neck velocity toward the green blip that looked like Mrs. Pac man, while the familiar pink, blue and red ghosts floated aimlessly along the screen like any other 31st century radar screen.

"Sweet pajamas of Nostradamus! Is it this herbal cigarette I be smoking or is that blip on a collision course with the ship?" Hermes said, his eyes somewhat blood shot.

"Sweet baby zombie Jesus! This movie isn't as funny as I thought it would be!" The Professor said, looking away from the shelters TV that was playing Talladega Knights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby-Solo, staring Will Farrell's head attached to Bending-bot 87218's body.

The Professor, in a swivel chair turned to the radar screen the lenses of his eye glasses filling up with sweat like an aquarium. He watched as the dot headed toward the green Mrs. Pac man astonished.

"What is all the commotion! You're interrupting the feast!" Zoidberg yelled, while scarfing down the rations Professor Farnsworth had stored away for inevitable planetary destruction or when he wanted to host a dinner party.

Hermes picked up a broom and began to hit the pesky crab man like he was some stray dog that had wandered into your trashcans at 2am on a cold December night.

"Gimme a hand here Scruffy, before this animal eats all of our food like a green snake in a sugarcane mill!" Hermes yelled to Scruffy who was napping.

"Shut up, you two, this blip is about to impact with the ship!" Farnsworth yelled at his two employees.

Captain Yesterday's red hair blew wildly in the wind as he hurtled closer to the plummeting ship. His eyes squinted through his domino mask as he prepared to lower the ships speed, and save his friends.

"Bender! I know there is something you had planned just in case of a crash, where none of us would make it, better say it now or forever hold your peace" Leela yelled.

Bender clanked into the cockpit and cleared his "throat".

"We're boned." He said simply and watched the city of New New York focus into view through his bulb like eyes.

The hull of the ship felt like it crashed into a mighty, invisible brick wall. Leela looked at the altimeter, they were still roughly a half mile above the city hovering. _But, that's impossible!_ She thought, she checked again and it read the same. Suddenly the ship began to slowly descend as if some outside force were lowering it gently like a small fragile toy. The ship leveled out and the cloud banks pleasantly vanished out of view like watching the surface of the ocean though a submarine porthole. Moments later the skyline of the city began to elevate by them.

Bob Eucker's head was calling yet another game at Shea Stadium, the Mets were in a real nail biter as they were only down 55-0 in the bottom of the ninth, with two blerns left against the Baltimore Orioles. It was the 3006 World Series.

"Cal Ripken's head comes up to bat. You may remember his incredible consecutive games streak back in the later half of the 20th century before baseball switched to blernsball. Ripken is now 10 games behind the Iron Donkey himself, Lou Gerigh the 40th who broke Ripken's original record back in 2939."

The umpire called time as a shadow began to cast over the infield, looking up he saw a ship lazily floating down to the ground, with a man dressed in disco attire and platform shoes guiding it. Cal Ripken's head watched as the infielders began to run off the field, but he didn't fear for his own safety since he was already "The Iron Man"

The few fans that were still at the game, and the Orioles fans began to boo Fry for interrupting the final game of the World Series.

"Whoops, sorry Mr. Ripken! Always been a big fan!" Captain Yesterday said as he carried the ship back to its proper position at the PE building.

"What a rip off of to a rip off of a superhero film!" Cal Ripken's head muttered watching the disco attired man carry the ship off. " Next they will have Kevin Spacey trying to make a land mass out of crystals." He said to the umpire who also hated Superman Returns.

Hermes and the Professor had gone to the rooftop of the building to get a better view of their demise, or the reason the ship had began to slowly descend from the sky. Captain Yesterday set the ship perfectly down into the docking bay, Leela had already deployed the landing gear, which ran on auxiliary power from internal batteries, the only thing they powered was the landing gear, and ironically not the engines, life support, or windshield wipers.

"Captain Yesterday? I thought you and the rest of the New Justice Team had vanished forever!" Professor Farnsworth said, not seeing through Fry's disguise.

"Errrrr, just passing through! Take care now!" Captain Yesterday said flying away.

He landed in a nearby ally and began to strip down to his street clothes, but this time he had forgotten them!

"Oh well. It's a warm day, nobody will mind if I walk around in my underwear in public, and after all this IS New New York!" He said, walking calmly down the street in his underwear as almost everyone else did in this section of Manhattan, Hell's Dryer.

When he got back to the Planet Express building everyone was sitting around the conference table talking about what had just happened. _Oh no. Leela and Bender know that I'm Captain yesterday! They must have told everyone!_

To Fry's relief nobody paid any attention as he had taken his seat at the table, they were all used to him being late for work or late from returning from lunch, come on it was Fry they were working with!

"That's an incredible story, indeed. Its company policy to have a check up with Dr. Zoidberg, to avoid legal concerns." Hermes concluded.

"And I am sure Fry is happy that you made it home safely, too!" The Professor added.

Fry gave a shy smile and a childish wave at his friends, Amy being the only one that smiled in return. Leela and Bender looked at him with amazement. Leela gestured toward the locker room so they could all explain this.

Bender looked around as he closed the door making sure none of the other staff was around to hear the conversation, but activated his tape recorded just in case he had to urge to sell it on eBay.

"Ok, Fry…..or should I say Captain Yesterday. That cream Zoidberg gave us wore out years ago, so what happened." Leela demanded.

"Well, Leela, I'm an alien from another planet, sent to Earth to stand for truth, justice and the American way!" Fry lied.

"Fry, I've gone over your records dozens of times. Your name is Phillip J. Fry, you where born in Old New York, you repeated kindergarten 3 times. You were assumed dead in the year 2000, and you have 3 unpaid parking tickets from July of 1996. There is no mention of you being an alien, although sometimes I'm sure people wondered about you in the past." Leela went on.

"Fine. That deodorant the Professor gave me, it somehow gave me superpowers, and a really bad rash in my armpits." Fry said, scratching at said area.

"Let me see this stuff." Leela ordered.

Fry reached into his coat pocket, he had changed before entering the conference room, and gave Leela the stick of deodorant.

"Hmm. Strong enough for a woman, but made for an atomic man." Leela said, handing it back. "Obviously it isn't intended for female use, so I am not Fry enough to try it."

"Fry enough?" Fry asked.

"Yeah, it's the new office joke, ever since you got your head stuck in the garbage disposal, we use it instead of stupid now." Leela laughed along with Bender who had to turn his own volume down.

" Fry, no offense but you don't have the ethics to be a superhero. Believe me, we are all grateful you saved our lives, the fact that it was YOU was even more grateful, crashing into the grown at mach 4 is theoretically safer than being rescued by you, the Professor calculated it last Thursday." Leela explained.

"Leela, for once I have something that nobody else has, that isn't an STD or a weird case of eye mucus. This is my gift, mine to share with the world. I'm not going to use them for evil or personal gain, I already saved your life, isn't that enough? Are you that selfish?" Fry fired back with emotions Leela thought non existent in the delivery boy.

Leela never got to finish the conversation as Fry walked through the door absent mindedly knocking it off of the hinges. He looked at the door and sighed as he left the building hanging his head in sorrow, his hands in his pockets.

Meanwhile in his secret hideout deep below New New York, Old New York and Mutant Town, the Zookeeper threw the remote control at the TV screen breaking it.

"Blah. Captain Yesterday. I, Zookeeper, the keenest criminal mind on the planet should be all over the media. I don't know how he was put on this issue of Evil Genius illustrated, he's a Superhero, those morons!" He cursed as he threw the magazine with Captain Yesterday's image on it to the floor.

He stomped through the model of New New York watching as the buildings were smashed one by one under his boots. He had worked his way towards the harbor and stopped his boot before he smashed the miniature Planet Express building. Looking at the small red building that stood near the harbor he realized something.

"Wait a minute, that's were those morons worked isn't it? Fry, Leela and that robot! Captain Yesterday, prepare to meet your match!" He said slowly crushing the Planet Express building under his foot, a clear feeling of happiness on his face. "Citizen Snips! Prepare the Zoo mobile! We have a pick up at Planet Express!" He ordered the small crab that was scurrying across the floor.

The Zoo Mobile, a hovering tram that was painted in a black and white zebra pattern slowly hovered and stopped upfront of the Planet Express buildings entrance. The zoo keeper emerged and looked at the cheerful red building.

Leela and Bender were playing each other in an intense game of Space Battle Ship. Bender was using fuming over the fact that a one eyed human was beating him mercilessly.

"Jay 9 trillion." Leela guessed.

"Damn it, you sunk my Nimbus!" Bender yelled flinging the game to the floor.

"Well aren't you the good sport, it was only the Nimbus, like that ship is worth anything." Leela said, taking a sip of her Ice T brand iced tea.

"Fry always let me win. Some friend you are Leela." Bender cried, turning away in disgust.

"Sorry to interrupt, are you guys busy" A familiar voice called.

"Nope, what do you want chump?" Bender said picking up the pieces for a rematch.

"Good, good, I want to take both of you hostage and lure Captain Yesterday into a trap!" The Zoo Keeper, causally laid out his plan like all comic and movie villains do.

"The Zoo Keeper! What the hell are you doing here!" Leela said taking up a fighting position.

Bender rolled up the coating on his extendable arms and shot the Zoo Keeper a glare.

"Somebody is pending for a bending." He said emotionless.

Bender began to advance toward the super villain, who pulled out a ray gun and shot a yellow burst of energy toward Bender who fell to the concrete floor motionless.

"What the hell did you do to him?" Leela snarled not taking her eyes off of the armed criminal.

"This is an Electro Magnetic Pulse gun. His circuits are fried, I anticipated he would be here. Now where is Yesterday!" The Zoo Keeper demanded.

"Yesterday? 24 hours ago, moron. Now you'd better get out of here before I kick your ass, I am a black belt in Arcturan Kung-Fu!" She warned.

The Zoo Keeper holstered his weapon and formed his own fighting stance. He hadn't had a good kung fu fight in awhile, it was a dying art.

"You asked for it, heee ya!" Leela said.

She attempted a flying kick toward him, but he simply stepped out of the way and watched as she crashed into the wall.

"Lets see if you can handle my Drunken Monkey! Hector!" The Zoo Keeper called.

"Hector what the hell does that mmmmpfh!" Leela gasped as a giant monkey hand covered her mouth.

Hector, the 800lbs gorilla that had been hiding in the hallway lifted Leela up like a rag doll and threw her over his shoulder. Leela pounded on his hairy back like an infant trying to beat up an NFL lineman. The large, drunken monkey staggered down the stairs carrying Leela and dragging Bender by his motionless legs, his head hitting every step on the way down.

To be continued……

_Will Fry realize his friends are in trouble, or will he let his feelings get to him and forget about them? Will Dr. Zoidberg shower? Will Hermes confront his marijuana problem? How come the Professor, Amy, Zoidberg didn't hear all of the commotion during the battle? Will I stop asking so many damn questions? All of this and more on our next chapter, same Captain Yesterday Channel, same Captain Yesterday Time!_


	6. Chapter 6

Fry slowly walked down the street lost in his sad thoughts. He walked directly into a lamp post and it fell down into traffic causing a 20 hover car pile up, the drivers screamed in agony as flames engulfed them. _Damn it Leela! You never believe in me. NEVER_

He found his way to his favorite bar, O'Zorgnax's Pub and decided to have a quick drink to help clear his head. He ordered his favorite non-Slurm beverage, a cold bottle of Canada's very best, LöBrau, which was his favorite beer.

"Nothing like a butt load of alcohol to turn a frown upside down." Fry toasted toward a Neptunian who looked like he was having a horrible day as well.

_Look at these losers. Drunks and dead beats. Ahh its good to be amongst my own kind._ He thought to himself. He took a sip of his beer when a man slipped on the floor and accidentally knocked Fry from his bar stool.

"Oh, I'm sorry about that. Let me buy you another drink!" The man said politely dusting the back of Fry's jacket off for him.

"Gee, thanks mister! Nice to know the world isn't full of miserable assholes." Fry said getting back on to his bar stool.

"Yes, Neptunians are usually around during the tourist season, and around the holidays to do some shopping, so its nice to be around when the miserable assholes aren't on the planet." They stranger said, patting Fry on the back once more.

_Gee this Klutz is more grabby than that other klutz I work with, err that's right AMY!_

The man paid for another, LöBrau and even got Fry a sandwich. After a few more minutes of conversing about the Mets losing the World Series, the man finally went on his way.

The bartender took Fry's empty bottle and replaced it with yet another bottle of LöBrau.

"Hey I don't have enough money on me to pay for that one!" Fry exclaimed to the bartender who was now drying off a few mugs and putting them under the counter.

"Don't worry about it kid, that guy that paid your tab was Oliver Waynequien, the second richest man in town! While you went to the bathroom when you got that peanut stuck in your nose he gave me 2 grand and told me to keep them coming for ya!" The alien bartender bragged.

"Oliver Waynequien? Never heard of him, I thought Mom's Friendly Robot Company kept most companies down, that she was the only billionaire in the city!" Fry asked.

"Jeez, kid. Where the hell you been for the past 25 years? Cryogenically frozen?" The Bartender said turning his back to Fry and helping another customer.

After a few more free beers, and cocktails for everyone, Fry staggered out of the bar. A shadowy figure perched on a roof top watched his drunken journey back to Robot Arms. Suddenly Fry ducked away into a poorly lit ally, the dark figure took out a pair of night vision binoculars and observed Fry.

"Aww come on, in public?" He grimaced putting the device back into his utility belt.

The shadowy figure pulled out a hand held radar device and watched a small red blip go around in circles.

"Wow, this guy is hammered. Maybe I should have only got him that one beer!" He mumbled to himself.

The shadowy figure watched as Fry emerged from the dark ally with his pants pulled down and one shoe missing. A group of thugs had mugged him and ran off in the other directions.

"This guy isn't the brightest superhero in the bat cave!" He muttered to himself once again, an apparent disgust in his voice.

Leela came too and realized that she wasn't in the Planet Express Building anymore. She let her single eye get accustomed to the darkness around her. Wherever she was it was dark, damp and certainly didn't smell very pleasant. She could hear the sound of water being sloshed around, and faint hisses.

"Hmm, better use the light on my wrist-a-ma-jig!" She said, turning on the flashlight on the device.

She guided the light through the darkness when all of the sudden, a large reptilian creature lunged toward her! It stopped when it realized Leela wasn't trying to move from her position. She nervously attempted to look for Bender, hopefully these things didn't like deactivated robot bodies. The light reflected off of a shiny metal surface that nearly blinded Leela since it was so dark.

"That must be Bender's shiny metal ass! Oh I could kiss it I'm so happy to see the piece of junk!" Leela exclaimed.

She carefully kept her eye on the beast as she slowly crawled toward Bender's body. Hopefully the Zoo Keeper's weapon hadn't ruined all of Bender's circuits; his nuclear pile was most likely still intact.

"Man he ways a ton!" She said grimacing to roll Bender on to his back so she could open his chest plate.

She opened his chest plate and rummaged through some of the contents. Money, credit cards, passports, various jewelry.

"Hey, I've been looking for these ear rings, I don't know ah never mind, almost and Walla!" Leela said working with some more of Bender's wiring.

She toggled his on/off switch a few times and Bender began to make a humming noise, and go through a series of beeps and bleeps and boops and other technical noises.

Bender's eyes began to illuminate in their friendly yellow color and his virtual mouth began to illuminate too, the lines that represented his emotions began to squiggle.

"I'm back baby!" Bender alerted.

He looked up at Leela who was still straddling him and looking down into his eyes with his chest plate open.

"So, Leela, ha ha…..see anything you like down there?" Bender joked.

Leela slammed his chest plate shut and stood up and kicked him in the side. Deep down she was glad Bender was operational again, she was secretly afraid of being left alone. It was a fear she had since childhood. Bender tried to stand up, but his arms and legs wouldn't move, not that he could get up when he was on his back anyway.

"Don't move so much Bender, that thing he shot you with knocked you out like Fry trying to read a book!" Leela whispered, taking a seat near Bender.

"I think what I'm feeling is either pain, or a bad case of the cramps." Bender grimaced.

"Uh, guys don't get those Bender." Leela commented.

"Oh. I see why you always use that one on Fry when he asks ya out!" Bender said, looking up at the darkness.

Leela brushed her hand through her hair and whipped her pony tail, not wanting to talk about relationships, or the childish delivery boy.

"Ya know, the poor kid is crazy about you Leela. It doesn't take a robot to see that his temperature and heat rate rise every time you enter the same room he is in, or when your name is brought up in conversation." Bender began, knowing this was a good way to get himself shut down again but risking it anyway.

"I know, its just that..Well..." Leela paused.

"Well what? Fry is a human adult male. He is the same age as you. Humans! Isn't your purpose to reproduce and continue life?" Bender asked.

"There's the key word, Bender, adult. He may legally be one, but you know how he is. Now can we talk about something else, like how to get out of here?" Leela raised her voice.

Suddenly the lights came on loudly from above. There prison seemed to be some kind of Alligator pen in the Old New York Zoo. There were roughly 30 of the scale covered animals lurking about the cement island Leela and Bender were on, and another 10 or so swimming in the murkey water that surrounded them.

"There is no escape, Turranga or should I say, Cloberella and Super King!" The Zoo Keeper said, appearing on a balcony over looking them.

"What do you want with us? We don't even have powers anymore!" Leela began to plead with the villain.

"Yes, and I am thankful for that. Your helping me lure in the biggest prey I have every captured, the most rare of all animals!" The Zoo Keeper went on.

"The albino black bear? The solid gold golden retriver?" Bender asked.

"No you idiot, I stole those not even 24 hours ago. Your idiot friend stole my spotlight, my 15 minutes of fame! For this he must DIE!" The Zoo Keeper went on, followed with a sinister laugh.

_Finally this idiot has found his way home! _The dark shadowy figure thought to himself looking at his watch. His tracking device led him to Fry's apartment in the Robot Arms building. Taking out a special card he slid it through the key card panel by Fry's door, the door wisped open and the figure lurked into the apartment.

Fry was passed out drunk on the filthy floor while an owl was pecking at his face. _Not really a neat freak aren't we Mr. Fry_ he thought to himself. _Now lets see what makes this idiot so Super_ the dark figure began to rummage through the already ram sacked apartment, at least it wouldn't look like somebody broke in.

An hour passed and the mysterious man that was following Fry hadn't found anything, he had managed to clean up Fry's apartment some, if not by accident. He rolled Fry onto his side, so he wouldn't choke on his own vomit in his sleep and left.

"Oww, it feels like the Planet Express Ship landed on my head, again!" Fry cried waking up.

"Damn! 10:30 I was suppose to be at work at 8! Oh well, at least I'm only a little teeny tiny bit late this time!" He said getting up and began to run.

"Wait a minute, I can fly!" He said jumping out of the side that was missing a wall.

The man from the bar, that night before was outside of the Robot Arms apartment and spotted Fry as he flew out of his apartment, He looked at the device and shut it off, he already knew where he was headed.

Fry arrived at work and found the Professor sitting alone at the conference table, with a sad look on his face.

"What's wrong Professor?" Fry asked, taking his regular seat.

"Fry, I thought you Leela and Bender had quit and left poor old Planet Express. Where is the rest of my loyal, and beloved crew?" The Professor asked.

"Well, I didn't see Bender at all last night, and Leela and I sorta got into an argument about the fact that I have….." Fry stopped to think of an excuse.

"Have what?" The Professor asked.

"Cooties. Yes that's it cooties." Fry added.

The Professor began to laugh and his wrinkly skin jiggled like it was a boneless creature." Fry, cooties have been vaccinated along with polio, the cow pox and the female morning sickness! Zoidberg, did you hear that!"

"Cooties, why yes, or as you called it in the 20th Century, Fry, The Bubonic plague. You idiots couldn't find connect the two. It was poor, hard working doctors like me that found the cure!" Zoidberg scuttled into the room joining in on the laughter.

"Zoidberg! Did you use my personal shower again?" The Professor's mood changed to pure hatred and anger.

"As a matter of fact, I did. I also broke your television!" He said, the towel still wrapped around his shelled body.

The Professor picked up a rolled up newspaper he had been reading and began to hit Zoidberg like somebody would hit a stay dog rummaging through their trash.

_Well it looks like Zoidberg took that shower. Who is the dark figure lurking in the shadows that seems to be following Fry? What is Oliver Waynequeen's role in all of this? Will Leela and Bender make it out alive and in Bender's case, operational? Find out next time on the same Yesterday channel, at the same Yesterday time!_


	7. Chapter 7

Since nobody the rest of the delivery crew hadn't shown up yet, Hermes angrily called all of the customers to let them know that Planet Express wouldn't be able to help them today, he had more than his share of angry people and space monsters cursing him over the phone.

"Dare, dat does it." Hermes said turning off the holophone.

The Professor had put Fry to work by alphabetizing his dooms day weapons with Amy.

"Thermo-Nuclear water balloon." Fry red off of a clip board.

"Check. We're done, and nothing got blown up! So we did a great job I'd say!" Amy said dusting off her hands.

Fry gave a friendly smile. Working with Amy was ok, she was nicer to him than Leela, but it wasn't flying through space and visiting new planets, well planets that were new to him.

"So what are you doing for lunch today, Fry?" Amy asked, taking the clipboard.

"I don't have any plans really. Can I ask you a question?" Fry asked.

"Well gluh, go ahead Fry!" Amy giggled.

"Do you know somebody named Oliver Waynequien? I ran into him last night, I figure maybe you knew him since you were a rich snobby person! Oh sorry, I didn't mean it like that!" Fry said, scratching the back of his head, confused as always.

"Eww, that creep! He took me to senior prom at Mars High School! Fry he's a stalker, sorta psychotic!" Amy began to take a more serious tone. "He isn't suppose to be within 2 galaxies of me, I even got cute reduction surgery so he wouldn't recognize me!"

"Oh that's a relief, I thought he was hitting on me. So how about lunch?" Fry asked, obviously not too worried.

Fry begged Amy to go to lunch even though she was terrified that there was an insane stalker that could be following her and Fry at this moment. She held Fry by the arm and clung to him.

"_Wow, he must have started working out, He never felt this muscular before, he was always sorta soft_!" Amy secretly admired to herself. _"Much more muscular than Kif!"_

"Amy, come on. He hasn't seen you in over a decade, he's grown up and runs a company from what I hear, and I know he isn't following us, come on don't be paranoid." Fry said.

He liked Amy, a lot but she was too clingy and he claimed that she ruined his rebellious loner image, and make work harder for him.

Above Fry, the paranoid billionaire was watching the couple through his binoculars. He thought the young Asian woman looked familiar, Amy Wong from Mars. A smile formed on his stern looking face.

"Fry! This guy stalked me throughout my first two years of college, and that company of his! It's a company that specializes in making weapons for the DOOP!" Amy said.

"This guy is capable of so much, it's not even funny! He owns ships, weapons, satellites even the rights to All my Circuits!" Amy went on.

They found a nice looking pizzeria and agreed to get lunch there. They found a booth and a waitress gave them some menus and went to get their drinks.

"Don't worry Amy, if he shows up I won't let him near you. I promise." Fry said, playing with a kids menu and some crayons.

"That's sweet of you Fry, but he makes Leela's kung-fu and martial arts look like a toddler." Amy said looking at him coloring.

"I think I can take him. How does pepperoni sound, since obviously there are no more, anchovies thanks to Zoidberg." Fry continued.

Oliver Waynequin kept his surveillance on the two from across the street, this time with a device that could pick up conversations from a short distance. It looked like a miniature satellite dish with headphones.

"Yeah, that's sounds good. So what's up with Leela and Bender? Did they quit?" Amy asked.

"I dunno. I haven't seen Bender in almost 2 days. Leela either. Hope they're ok." Fry wondered.

"Hmm. This Leela must be Cloberella." The stalker mumbled to himself.

Apparently he had seen and heard enough, as he put the device back into his coat pocket and stormed off through traffic. Fry and Amy's pizza had come and they were nearly finished when the TV went blank and flickered, and the image of the Zoo Keeper came to view.

"New New York, I interrupt your daily programming for a special bulletin! I Zoo Keeper have taken over the airwaves to bring you this!" He went on like he was a newscaster.

The camera panned to Leela and Bender who were trapped in the alligator pit. Fry could see that Bender was down and Leela actually looked somewhat frightened.

"Captain Yesterday, I know you're out there. It would be a shame if my pets ate your friends wouldn't it!"

"Your pets can bite my shiny metal ass!" Benders voice interrupted the Zoo Keeper.

"Oh don't worry, they will indeed bite your shiny metal ass robot, I have a special one for you. Gator-bot 9 million!"

The camera zoomed out and the water began to bubble and all of the smaller, biological gators swam away in a panic, a dinosaur sized alligator robot rose from the depths and fire came out of nostrils.

"We're boned." Bender whined.

Amy looked at the TV screen in shock and total disbelief.

"What would he want with a one eyed mutant and a fowl mouthed bending bot?" She asked Fry.

Fry's seat was empty and he had left a $2 tip. Amy gasped at the empty spot where Fry had just been.

"Cheap skate!" Amy grumbled and began to swear in Cantonese.

Fry got back to his apartment to change where Oliver Waynequin was waiting for him. He had found a spot on the couch and was watching the Zoo Keeper's broadcast.

"What the hell are you doing here?" Fry yelled.

"Well Mr. Fry, or should I say, Captain Yesterday, believe it or not I'm the only person who can help you at the moment." He said calmly turning the TV off.

"How do you know that I'm Captain Yesterday?" Fry asked in disbelief.

Waynequin adjusted the tie on his business suit and cleared his throat.

"You're not the only one with special gifts Mr. Fry. I am an alien from Planet Marvel." The weird billionaire went on.

"Never heard of it. Now who the hell are you?" Fry asked.

"You see, Marvel was destroyed long ago in a galaxy far, far away. My father, Marvel's most brilliant scientist sent me here, to Earth in a tiny spaceship he built just for me. I arrived in a town called Bigville, Kansas where a friendly older couple found me and sold me on eBay. My step parents Jonathan and Martha Waynequin took care of me for most of my young life. That is until one horrible night nearly 20 years ago when they were murdered in a dark ally by an unknown man and a crack squad of animals. I was bitter, and angry. I left the city to seek training so that I may find vengeance. When I was 17 on safari in the jungles of Mar's I was bitten by a radioactive spider, and became blessed with powers beyond belief. Then a few years later I was caught in a gamma radiation accident at a Jets game, and it caused me to turn green and go insane smashing everything when I was a gigantic hulk. After that I came back here to New New York, I've finally found the man that murdered my parents!" He explained.

"My God, it was The Joker, wasn't it?" Fry asked.

"No, worse, it was The Zoo Keeper!"

"Wow that was one hell of a superhero creation story; you had the origin stories of 4 different superheroes." Fry went on amazed.

"Yes, therefore it is my destiny to become a hero. Why would all of these events happen to me?" He asked.

"I don't know good luck and being in the right place at the right time? Oh wait no, your entire race was destroyed, the people that were suppose to love you sold you and your step parents were murdered and you went to a Jets game in the Meadowlands of New Jersey." Fry apologized.

"Indeed. And I vowed never to allow anyone to go through these pains again, Fry. When I heard Captain Yesterday had returned, I realized now was my time!"

"So what is your superhero name? The Hulking-Bat-Spider?" Fry asked.

"No, those names were already taken. I am Owl Man!" Waynequien announced.

"Wasn't that Batman's evil twin in an alternate reality? If its stuff I know about its comic books, star trek and making garbage, all traits this world needed!" Fry bragged.

"I never read comic books; I had a girl friend and a life." He went on.

"Oh, I can see why then. I didn't have those when I was a teenager." Fry replied.

"Obviously. It doesn't take a master detective to know that."

Fry sighed. There was always time for a joke on his own expense, even when he had God like powers and saved the city from destruction dozens of times.

"So what kind of powers do you have?" Fry asked._ Please not as cool as mine please not as cool as mine._

"None. The radioactive spider kept me in the hospital for nearly 3 months, and the gamma radiation that made me a monster gave me a bad case of diarrhea. I am a billionaire and use my money to fund my alter ego; I use gadgets, my own intelligence and standard martial arts to get by." He explained.

"Oh, ok." Fry began to snicker.

Oliver grabbed Fry by the arm and threw him into the wall, leaving an imprint.

"Ok, ok, you're not weak. That sort of hurt too!" Fry grimaced.

"Your powers must be wearing off, how did you get them?" Oliver asked.

"A stick of deodorant." Fry said.

"Hmm whatever was in it is wearing off. Where is this deodorant, you could use a recharge, and you are beginning to smell bad too." Oliver asked.

"Damn it! I left it in the Professor's shower at Planet Express Building!" Fry exclaimed.

Oliver gave a slight look of doubt and sighed. _I had a feeling working with this guy wasn't going to be easy._

"Well we don't have time to get it. If we want to save your friends, we must go now, you should have enough energy to fight him, and it's not like your going to be alone!"

Within moments the two headed toward the Sewers. Owl Man used his detective skills, by asking Captain Yesterday if he recognized the under ground zoo. Captain Yesterday claimed that it was the old Yankee Stadium, but remembered animals live in the zoo. Owl Man gave Captain Yesterday a cookie for his outstanding deduction.

They arrived at the Old New York Zoo, which was underneath the city, forgotten by time. Owl Man took something out of his utility belt.

"What is that?" Fry asked.

"Breath mint! Do you want one?" Owl Man offered.

They were suddenly hit by an energy beam; it was a force field holding them in!

"Damn it!" Fry said punching the force field trying to break it.

The field shocked him and he fell to the ground. Smoke began to come from his ear drums and his skin looked somewhat charred. Owl Man simply looked at him.

"Looks like its electrified, good job Captain Yesterday!" He exclaimed.

"Holy electrified booby traps. That hurts." Fry grimaced.

"Your powers are falling faster than Rosie O'Donnell's career." Owl Man helped him to his feet.

The two costumed heroes looked at the electrified force field. Captain Yesterday touched it again and it zapped him knocking him to the ground. Owl Man shook his head in disbelief.

_Oh no! Captain Yesterday is losing his powers! Is Owl Man really a force of good? Will they get out of the force field? Find out next time on the same Yesterday channel and the same Yesterday time!_


	8. Chapter 8

Owl Man sighed at Captain Yesterday in disgust. He reached into his utility belt and pulled out a device that Fry wouldn't classify.

"What the heck is that thing?" He asked.

"This is the Owl-Force Field disrupter!" Owl Man exclaimed.

"You had that the entire time, and watched me zap myself twice?" Captain Yesterday began to turn red.

"Well, yeah." He answered.

Owl Man put the device onto the force field and with a hum it began to disrupt the field, soon it was completely gone.

"Watch out for traps, I bet he has them all over." Owl Man warned his not too bright colleague.

"Don't worry; I got eyes like a hawk!" Captain Yesterday replied.

"Than why is your foot caught in that bear trap?" Owl Man asked.

"Bear trap?" Captain Yesterday looked down at his foot. "OH MY GOSH GET IT OFF GET IT OFF!"

Captain Yesterday began to run around frantically screaming like a young child. Owl Man stood there and watched as the suspected superhero ran around flailing his arms like reeds in the wind.

"Captain Yesterday, watch out for that minefield!" Owl Man warned.

Captain Yesterday couldn't hear the warning he was still to busy running around aimlessly and screaming his lungs out. He ran straight into the mine field, which was clearly marked with a sign. Sprinting aimlessly threw the field he set off dozen of land mines and was being tossed around like a rag doll in the process.

Owl Man watched on as Captain Yesterday escaped the mine field and ran into an electrified fence.

"Yarrrrrrrgh this fence is electric! Oh my God it hurts, it hurts!" Captain Yesterday wailed in pain.

Captain Yesterday held onto the fence for awhile longer, and it eventually shorted out his hair was standing straight up and was smoking.

"Ha ha, Zoo Keeper, your traps are nothing to me!" Captain Yesterday bellowed waving his fist in the air.

"You just stepped into the same bear trap, again!" Owl Man said.

"Oh my gosh get it off get if off!" He yelled running back into the mine field.

Owl Man covered his face with his hands in disgust. This was going to be along day.

A few minutes and after watching Captain Yesterday run around aimlessly into the same bear trap, the mine field, a pit of alligators, being chased by a pack of rabid poodles and getting his head stuck in a hole in the ground for no apparent reason, the two finally found their way into the lair.

"I did a good job of clearing out those traps didn't I? I was all whoosh wham boom bang!" Fry went on like a 6 year old making noises.

"Oh you did all of that on purpose? You had me confused when you were yelling Lord help me, oh god, it hurts somebody anyone help me, please don't let them eat me!" Owl Man joked.

"Well, what did you do huh?" Captain Yesterday asked.

"Shut up." Owl Man replied.

The two found their way to the alligator pit where Bender and Leela were being held.

"Friends of yours?" Owl Man asked.

" No, just two people I work with. Let's leave them!" Captain Yesterday sneered.

Owl Man slapped him in the face; Captain Yesterday fell to the ground.

"Oww what did you do that for?" He grimaced.

"That is no way for somebody that claims to be a superhero to talk!" Owl Man yelled at him.

"Well they don't want me to be a hero; they say I am not cut out for it! They told me I was nothing but a mistake! They never support me!" Captain Yesterday said, getting back up.

"They care about you more than you know. They don't want to see you make a huge mistake!" Owl Man went on.

Owl Man shoved him out of the way and began to climb into the pit. Captain Yesterday watched as he began to swim across the alligator infested water towards his friends.

_What does he know! He doesn't have to hear them tell me these things. Fry don't put your head in there, Fry don't put your hand down the garbage disposal when it's turned on. Fry it's not a good idea to put your tongue on that pole its too cold outside. Fry don't drink bleach. He's just like them! I'll take care of the Zoo Keeper myself that will show them!_ Captain Yesterday sprinted away.

"Who are you?" Leela asked.

"I'm Owl Man. Your friend is acting like a 12 year old and wanted to leave you here. So what's the deal? What did you guys do or say to him?" He asked tending to Bender.

"Well, he acts like a child, and he has to be the dumbest person I've ever met." Leela went on.

"Aww cram it Leela! You're just afraid he will reject you like everyone else does except that moron, Brannigan. Admit it!" Bender said.

"Ahh, an Electro Magnetic Pulse wound. I have just the thing. My Owl Electromagnetic Pulse damage repairer should do the trick!" Owl Man declared taking out yet another device and putting it onto Bender's chest plate.

Within moments the small disc shaped device began to blink and make small beeping noises. Bender's circuitry had been miraculously repaired and he was soon standing up again.

"I'm back, baby!" Bender exclaimed.

Leela looked at the strange man dressed like an Owl with her one eye.

"How did you know to bring that?" Leela asked.

"If I told you that, I would be giving up my secrets. Here take this pamphlet." Owl Man suggested.

"The Official Owl Troubled Relationship Pamphlet?" Leela read out aloud.

"I'm prepared for anything. Now let's get out of here!" Owl Man declared.

"One problem, chump. We are kind of in a tank full of alligators and a robo gator!" Bender replied.

Owl Man once again reached into his belt and pulled out another device.

"Wow, you have everything in that thing. What is this some kind of Owl gator repellant device?" Leela asked, putting the pamphlet in her pocket.

"No such thing exists. This is my Ipod! I figure I'll at least go out to some tasteful music!" Owl Man cried.

Leela turned to Bender and crossed her arms and squinted her eye. Bender shot back a confused look. She began to stomp her left foot.

"What?" Bender asked.

"Ahem." Leela coughed.

"Oh! We're boned!" Bender replied.

Leela nodded in agreement, and watched as the alligators swam lazily around the cement island they were being held captive.

"Bird Brain wh-"

"It's OWL MAN. O-W-L M-A-N!" Owl Man screamed over a classical song, possibly American Idiot, Leela didn't listen to much classical music.

"Whatever." The Cyclops replied sarcastically. "Where is Fr-, I mean Captain Yesterday?" She asked looking toward the observation spot.

Owl Man didn't answer, just went on listening to his music. Leele groaned in disapproval.

Captain Yesterday worked his way through a large building that had once served as the reptile house. His powers were weak, but he still could use his sense of super guessing to find the Zoo Keeper.

He peeked into a half open door and saw the Zoo Keeper sitting at a battered desk, he wasn't facing him._ HA HA, he must have dozed off, this should be easier than taking candy from a baby, well not that time I tried taking that candy from that baby Amazonian she tore my arm off, but this time, it's different!_

He jumped into the room and grabbed the Zoo Keeper.

"I gotcha! Now surrender you, whoa!" Captain Yesterday screamed.

It was a trap! A large gorilla that reeked of whisky grabbed Captain Yesterday by the neck and began to choke him with his massive hand. Captain Yesterday's face began to turn a bluish tint.

"I can't…….cant breath." Captain Yesterday gasped, trying to pry the gorilla's strong grip loose.

The real Zoo Keeper stomped into the room and began to laugh in a sinisterly watching the powerful gorilla crush his nemesis like a marshmallow.

"Not this time Yesterday! Today Yesterday ends, and tomorrow is err never mind!" The Zoo Keeper began to go on a long monologue. "You and your friends will never stand in my way again, the entire world will be at my command, I have won!"

"You'll….. never…. Win…. You…… venomous snake! You fiend….." Captain Yesterday choked out.

"Save your breath, no need to quote bad lines from cheesy superhero shows. Its over!" Zoo Keeper began to laugh.

_Damn it! If only I would have brought that deodorant. Whew, I smell ripe. ALSO, it would be helping the whole super strength department, and I wouldn't be getting my ass handed to me by a drunken monkey! Wait a minute! I still have enough energy, I wonder if this works, please oh please._ Fry closed his eyes; he could feel his brain about to pop out of his skull the gorilla was applying so much force. He thought hard, as hard as his weak mind could think.

Meanwhile, back at the Planet Express Building Dr. Zoidberg was reading his human anatomy book hi-lighting the vital things he had forgotten over the years since he attended Dr. Nick Rivera Medical School in Eugene, Oregon. He admired his work; the whole entire book word for word was highlighted in yellow.

"Who would have known the human body only has 1 rectum!" Zoidberg exclaimed to himself.

His head began to ache, and he slammed the book down onto his desk. A strange pulsing sound began to flood his mind. Strange calls of help from a voice that sounded all too familiar to him suddenly began to call him towards the originator.

"Like a hammer hitting my head, it feels like. It's like somebody is trying to call me they are. Somebody calling me telepathically hooray! Hooray for Zoidberg!" The bizarre lobster creature whooped out of his office.

The Zoo Keeper continued to watch the gorilla literally squeeze the life out of Captain Yesterday, but he had a second thought.

"Good boy, Donkey. Good boy. Here is a banana let him go." The Zoo Keeper handed his pet the treat and watched him as he lumbered out of the room. "I want to let you see the death of your friends first."

He turned on a screen on a surveillance system and Captain Yesterday looked at the image of his friends trapped on the island. Bender took notice of the camera and began to give the middle finger from his 3 fingered hand. He could hear a faint, bite my shiny metal ass in the distance to complement it. Captain Yesterday tried to get up to his feet, but was so out of breath he could only push the top half of his body off the cold metal floor. His legs felt lifeless and tired.

"Would you like some popcorn? Maybe some gummy bears?" The Zoo Keeper offered.

"How……how about Slurm? Got any Slurm? Captain Yesterday croaked out in pain.

The Zoo Keeper only replied with a sinister laugh. Tormenting Captain Yesterday even further seemed to be brightening his day more and more, no matter how small the details. "No Slurm, all I have his Worm Juice and Sierra Mist."

"Blah…….I'll take the Worm Juice!" Captain Yesterday groaned.

"HA HA, you are too easy. I only have Sierra Mist!" The Zoo Keeper continued to torment him.

"NOOOOOOO!" Captain Yesterday howled in pain.

Leela looked toward the direction his yell had came from and could only imagine what methods of torture the Zoo Keeper was employing on her friend. She heard the robotic alligator starting to surface before her eye. All of the smaller, living gators swam away in horror. Owl Man had assumed a fetal position and Bender had somehow acquired a new Ipod as he was dancing around and humming. The small concrete island began to shake and cracks began to form from the weight of the gigantic robot monster. She gulped; there was nothing she could do. There was no way to fight it, if she tried to swim for it she would be eaten alive, this was the end. She closed her eye and heard a strange whooping noise. No, it couldn't be, or could it? She opened her single eye.

"Dr. Zoidberg?" She asked in amazement.

Still whooping, the lobster creature jumped into the tank and began to swim towards the giant robot alligator. In a flash it turned around and faced its new threat.

"Ah ha! Just as I deducted. This alligator has lead poisoning!" Zoidberg began to diagnosis the robot. "Take two of these and call me in the morning, and don't operate any heavy machinery!" He said taking off an access plate on the robot like a piece of tin foil and dropping two hand grenades the Professor and left lying around.

The robot's stomach area exploded and the rest of it feel to the ground with a loud thunderous boom.

"Also, Id avoid eating any spicy foods for at least 2 weeks, I would." The Doctor added to his "patient".

Owl Man got back to his feet and began to dust himself off casually, like nothing had happened, and Bender continued to dance. The cowardly superhero snatched back his Ipod and Bender stopped and appeared to be crushed.

"How did you know we were here?" Leela asked the incompetent doctor.

"It seems Fry has gained the power to talk to sea creatures, he has! Also, he told me his neck was about to be snapped like a twig. Is this bad for humans?" Zoidberg asked.

"Come on lets go, I hope the moron hasn't gotten himself killed!" Pigeon Ma-"

"Owl Man. It's not that hard!" Owl Man began to get frustrated.

"Whatever, do you have a rope or something we need to get out of this pit?" Leela started to take control of the situation as she usually did.

"Better! I have the Owl-alligator pit escaping boots!" He bellowed.

"Why the hell didn't you think about using them before chump? You're what to super heroism as Zoidberg is to medical care!" Bender yelled.

"Oh, Bender, please, I simply do my job, but yes I have had many successful operations, like that time I put Fry's head on Amy's body, remember that? Or the time I re attacked Fry's gentiles on his-"

"Zoidberg come on!" Leela yelled.

They all grabbed onto Owl Man and he clicked his boots, you guessed it, 3 times and they blasted to life. He glided them safely out of the pit, a few alligators jumped up toward them but missed; Leela could smell their hot, rotten breaths.

_Gasp! Well Leela be able to control this group of misfits? Will said group of misfits get to Captain Yesterday before the Zoo Keeper quits stalling in typical bad guy fashion and decides to kill him? Will Owl Man actually do something worth while? _

_Find out next time, same Yesterday Channel, same Yesterday time!!!_


	9. Chapter 9

Owl Man and the rest of the group landed outside of the pit. Leela looked around, gazing the surroundings with her single eye, trying to deduce a plan.

"Damn it, this place is too big, it could take hours before we find Fry!" Leela cursed to herself.

"Actually, Fry told me where he was in his telepathy, he did." Zoidberg offered.

"Cheese it; I'd recognize these disco era foot prints anywhere! Follow me!" Bender ordered.

"Always with the disrespect toward Dr. Zoidberg, I have the nerve to tear you limb from limb, row bit.!" Zoidberg snarled in his Yiddish accent.

"Zoidberg, shut the hell up! Bender don't be mean to Zoidberg. You did a good job Dr. Zoidberg, now lets all focus on finding Fry!" Leela demanded.

"Hooray somebody is being nice to me! Hooray for me, hooray for Zoidberg!" The strange lobster alien cheered.

Leela rolled her eye and started to follow Bender who had already started without them. He was either really concerned for Fry's health or Fry had a few spare bucks in his superhero costume. Moments later they found their way to the reptile house.

"Ok, there are a lot of rooms in this hell hole. We all need to split up. Bender, Zoidberg you go that way. Guano Man and I will go this way!" Leela whispered.

"ITS OWL MAN" The hero dressed like a brown Batman yelled.

Owl Man's yelling began to echo through the halls, and soon animals of all sizes and shapes howled and roared from different corridors toward the noise of the intruders. Leela was losing her patience with this guy; he was turning into a real nuisance, even worse than Dr. Zoidberg himself.

"Nice going meat bag. Leela, shouldn't we team up the two rejects?" Bender begged.

"Sorry, Bender not this time. I figure we could each use a decoy or a human shield if need be." Leela explained, putting her hands on her hips, she hoped that Owl Man and Zoidberg would think she was being sarcastic, yet she was 100 honest.

Bender's right eye flashed as if he were winking at her idea. She heard a faint evil chuckle as well.

"Ok, let's go Owl Man, or whatever your name is. Zoidberg, be careful and listen to Bender!" Leela ordered as her and Owl Man took off the opposite end of the hall.

"The Zoo Keeper probably has finished off your friend! His powers where fading fast, he could barely think he was so tired!" Owl Man said in between huffs and puffs while the two sprinted side by side down the hallway.

"No, he is just that big of a moron!" Leela replied.

Bender and Zoidberg had begun their search for there missing comrade as well. The robot and the shell fish wandered the dark hall of the dark, smell building.

"Ahh. Smells like my cousin Zoidfarb's house, it does!" Zoidberg inhaled the putrid air.

The duo stepped into a door that was left open. Bender's eyes zoomed out of his head and he began to babble like a lunatic in a candy store. The small, solid gold retriever jumped up and down and wagged its tail. The small clanks filled the room.

"Oh you're God!" Bender exclaimed running to the small animal.

The robot opened his chest cavity and casually placed it inside, whistling a tune to himself. Zoidberg stood silent.

Leela and Owl Man had stumbled upon the drunken ape who had manhandled Leela earlier. He seemed to be passed out, a bottle of LeBrou in his outstretched paw. The two silently crept over him and hear a wheezing noise from behind a steel door. She silently pushed the steel door open, the rusty hinges squealed like a moaning whale.

_Damn it! That was loud enough to wake the dead in space!_ She cringed as she pushed the door fully open.

"Fry!" She exclaimed as she saw the red headed delivery boy/superhero lay on the ground. He still appeared to be breathing, she wasn't a doctor, but she knew more than Zoidberg that he was still alive!

"Leela…..I blew it. He got away, you were right, I am a failure at everything I do!" Captain Yesterday gasped.

Owl Man let Leela tend to the injured youth. He pulled out a scanner and began investigating around the room, looking for clues or anything else that would lead him to the Zoo Keeper.

"No, no. You are not a failure, it's just that well, you're not good at anything!" Leela comforted him. "But you're a good friend, a great friend."

"Sorry to ruin the moment, but I found the Zoo Keeper!" Owl Man interrupted.

"Where?" Leela called still tending to Fry.

A bolt of energy whizzed past Leela's ear and hit the floor leaving a smoking crater. She could feel the skin on her ear burn, it just missed.

"Right here, and don't bother fighting me, I have taken your friend hostage!" The Zoo Keeper taunted.

Leela slowly got to her feet and faced the voice. The Zoo Keeper had taken Owl Man hostage and the weapon aimed at her.

"He isn't a friend of mine, trust me. I already run around with enough morons as it is!" Leela said, sarcastically.

"Enough with the small talk!" The Zoo Keeper shot the weapon through Owl Man's head and he fell limp to the floor. Without hesitation he effortlessly aimed the weapon at Leela and hit her directly in the chest!

"No! You…you monster, why? Why?" Captain Yesterday pleaded.

"All criminals break the law; I'm breaking the law of comic bad guys, to let the hero live so he can be defeated!" The Zoo Keeper explained blasting Fry in the shoulder.

"Hey chump! Only me and me alone will shoot him and put him out of his misery! He promised me!" Bender's voice boomed through the room. A small barking sound emitted from his chest cavity.

"You thief!" The Zookeeper aimed the weapon at Bender and blasted him through his head. Bender's eyes went dark and a plate covered his single socket. The Bending bot fell to the ground like a pile of trashcans falling down.

"Now it's your turn, all of your friends, are gone. I promised you that you would watch!" The Zoo Keeper said, zapping Fry in the head this time.

The Zoo Keeper stepped over Fry's body, as if it was a puddle in the street. He didn't even bother to look at his handy work. He opened Bender's chest cavity and reclaimed his latest heist and left the room.

Moments later Dr. Zoidberg scuttled into the dark room and gasped at the horror he saw before his eyes.

"What is this? My friends, all of them dead?" Zoidberg looked up into the sky and bellowed why.

The lobster dug his face into his claws and began to cry silently to himself.

Suddenly a memory from long ago played in his head.

"_Even though you've been raised as a decopodian, you are not one of them. You have great powers, only some of which you have yet discovered."_

Zoidberg stopped crying and lifted his head out from his claws. "Yes, yes of course!"

"_They can be a great people, Kal-El, I mean Zoidberg, and they wish to be. They only lack the light to show the way. For this reason above all, their capacity for good, I have sent them you…my only son"_

Zoidberg began to scuttle in circles, faster and faster whooping the entire time. He became faster the speed of sound; his speed still grew and grew. Moments, later he was nothing but a blur, and soon not even visible! The lobster man had broken the speed of light! The earth's rotation began to reverse, slowly at first but picked up speed gradually. Finally the lobster stopped his scuttling and whooping…The room was empty. None of his friends where longer visible, no signs of violence. Zoidberg looked at his watch.

"If my calculations are correct, I must act fast, I must." Zoidberg said to himself scuttling out of the room.

"That damn lobster! Late again!" Hermes said eyeing the office clock.

"So what are we waiting around for Hermes?" Leela asked.

"The Professor doesn't have any deliveries so he wants to parade out some of his inventions. Dats all" Hermes explained.

"Shouldn't somebody, uh, wake him up?" Fry asked.

"That's Zoidberg's job mon. In case the Professor wakes up dead." Hermes objected.

"Fine, I'll do it." Amy went on.

Zoidberg continued to scuttle his way towards the Planet Express Building. Turning back time, had taken a lot out of him, he had been neglecting his work out regime.

A few moments later the Professor emerged in his lab coat and slippers. He saw that his beloved crew had sat at their respected spots waiting for him.

"Ha ha, the academy called me a fool, but I have done it. I have created a deodorant so potent, that it has the ability to work for one entire week even with excessive showering and sweating." Professor Farnsworth bragged holding up a stick of deodorant.

Zoidberg slid into the room and slipped on the waxed floor. The lobster flew directly into the frail Professor and they both landed on the ground. The sound of fragile bones breaking sickened the crew.

"You clumsy oaf!" The Professor howled. "That was my second artificial hip this week! Zoiiiiiiiiiiiiiidberg!" The Professor yelled.

"Nice going, you worthless, oh nevermind! Come on lets get the Professor to a real doctor!" Hermes ordered.

Zoidberg watched as the rest of the Planet Express crew hauled the Professor to the ship on a stretcher. He felt bad that he had accidentally injured the frail old man, whom had given him the job even though his medical knowledge was shady at best. He heard the sound of the ship blast out of the docking bay and toward the Taco Belleview Hospital. Making sure nobody was around; he took a familiar red and blue plastic deodorant stick and smashed it effortlessly in his claws.

"Worthless, am I?" Zoidberg asked no one in particular.

Zoidberg scuttled into his office and looked through his telephone directory. He dialed the number to the New New York Zoo.

"New New York Zoo? Yes, It is I the Zoo Keeper, bwa ha ha ha. I am going to steal your beloved solid golden retriever. So don't alert the police force or I will be foiled!" Zoidberg went on.

The man on the other line had no time to speak back; the Doctor slammed the phone down into its cradle.

"Another day saved. That's that." Dr. Zoidberg congratulated himself.

The End………..Or is it?


End file.
